Reviews on "Inability to Act" by
ghostofbambi
Written by Anonymous on chapter #5.
(March 5th 2008, 6am)wow!That was amazingly brill!!I love Peters character and I love the idea behind it all...i love james' infatuation i love lily's inablity to act..i love the way james needs her and i love the way remus thinks AMAZING!keep up the good work
deepthi
Written by Anonymous on chapter #1.
(January 30th 2008, 10am)TSud08 bhcefupxjfcu, [url=http://ctsdizrtkqen.com/]ctsdizrtkqen[/url], [link=http://nexwjoewaphq.com/]nexwjoewaphq[/link], http://lwgottcynbmc.com/
Written by Anonymous on chapter #5.
(December 1st 2007, 5am)Great story. Very angsty, but very well crafted. Would have been interesting to have a chapter about Sirius too though.

Written by
(November 4th 2007, 8pm)

Grimm_Sister on chapter #5.What an amazing way to turn this fic - using Peter who, years later, will indeed say something he promised (Sirius) he wouldn't.
I LOVE the twist.
I also enjoyed your characterization of Peter. I really like that he was the character who didn't seem to...instinctively understand the situation the way the others always have. Stephen Collins was the most dramatic example, but the others always had a sense of what the situation really was even if they didn't trust it - at the very least their observations of others. Peter works everything out, bit by bit, with the help of clues (and confessions).
It was a lovely thing to differentiate about him.
Poor Remus is down there in the Shack all this time? Goodness, boys, work out your issues tomorrow!

Written by
(November 4th 2007, 5pm)

Grimm_Sister on chapter #2.I am really enjoying these. I love what a big deal he makes of the fact that "He didn't like it" and afterwards Lily regrew her hair. What I like about this is the hint that James makes Lily see herself clearly and his disapproval can make her feel like she's isn't herself without her long hair.
Stephen reminds me of the boyfriend in a situation two of my friends had. I'm not going to go into details. I just wanted to give you the compliment of making this real enough that it connects up with real life situations.
What I wonder is how long you can string out the theme of inability to act and if you plan on making a full story arc with this.
I do love that you end both chapters (probably every chapter) with "So he says nothing." I really love this motif.

Written by
(November 4th 2007, 5pm)

Grimm_Sister on chapter #1."He should answer her question, but everything he wants to say is everything he can't."
I really liked that line.
You pain the obsessiveness of James's feelings for Lily very well without just describing them. You let them unfold from his actions and thoughts, which is so nice to see in a romance fic. I also like how he is not blinded to her faults but in fact capable of seeing them more clearly than probably anyone else.
Okay, I'm going on to read the next chapter.

Written by blue_jeans on chapter #5.
(October 22nd 2007, 2am)oh oh oh oh!!! (: update soon!!
omg i'm deing to know what happens next!!! please please please update soon!!!! AHHH!!!
Written by Anonymous on chapter #5.
(September 11th 2007, 2pm)When I started off reading this story,I never thought that I would like this story so much. But, what I really liked best about your story was the chapter on Peter. People usually find it easy to mar his character-as if he was already a criminal in school-, but the way you have done it, I could totally imagine him turning out so different from his friends.
But, I don't want the story to end! Can you continue this? It's too good to have this type of ending. Don't you think it's evil to end a story when it's going really well? :D I'm sure you could do so much more with this story!
~matilda
Written by Anonymous on chapter #5.
(July 24th 2007, 7pm)sweet. is this story finished or still in progress?
of course, i hope its in progress, but hey, whatever.
pce.Written by Anonymous on chapter #5.
(July 16th 2007, 9pm)Utterly Amazing! I'm pretty sure this is the end, sad, I love you writing style!
Written by Anonymous on chapter #5.
(June 4th 2007, 8pm)Amazing. Amazing, amazing, AH-MAZING!!! You're rediculously good at writing everyone! I'm so jealous.

Written by infinitelyrare on chapter #5.
(May 20th 2007, 8pm)Oh, wow... I seriously think that this is now one of the best fics I've read and definitely one of my favorite. I absolutely loved your take on Peter's personality and Lily's perception of James and everything else as well! Oh, and I particularly love the canon-ness. So yeah, thank you for such a wonderful fic. :)

Written by SilentDreamer666 on chapter #5.
(April 11th 2007, 10pm)I love this story!!!!!! you are amazing!!! I hope to see some new stuff from you soon!!!

Written by anna126 on chapter #5.
(April 6th 2007, 2am)I love how you used Peter.
& also everything about this story.
Sirius was a little bit obvious (that he didn't want to give up James to Lily), but that's probably less because of your writing than because other stories have used the same...
Anyway, really, brilliant story.
Written by anna126 on chapter #2.
(April 6th 2007, 2am)I am positively astounded by your quality of writing.

Written by AutumnColours on chapter #5.
(April 3rd 2007, 3pm)Asgjkl. I LOVED this. Your characterisation is really good; they all seemed so real, and in character. As others have said, it was somewhat refreshing to see Peter there. :) I know you apologised for leaving Sirius out but I think it worked fine without him: we don't really see much of him until the last chapter anyway, and I think it actually works really well just to see his interaction with Peter from Peter's point of view.
I noticed a few grammar errors, although I've completely forgotten where and what they were now, so I guess that's not too helpful!
Anyway, yes. I've really, really enjoyed reading this (it made a wonderful break from revision!) and I'm looking forward to reading anything else you update. :)
-Philippa
Written by Anonymous on chapter #5.
(March 28th 2007, 9pm)Along with the other reviewers, I want to thank you profusely for adding Peter in, and for having him ultimately (I think) bringing Lily and James together. I liked what you said about how Peter always though they'd be good together. It makes his betrayel even more heartbreaking. Anyhoo, quite a capital story you've got here. You really know your stuff when it comes to the complexity and feelings of humans. Is this the end, or is there another chapter coming up? If another chapter, update soon please! Congratulations on being spotlighted!
Written by Anonymous on chapter #5.
(March 19th 2007, 1am)I LOVE this story, because you, unlike most MWPP authors that I know, don't make Peter some crappy little whiney boy.
The fact that Peter, out of all these people, has the ability to take action is amazing. I love it and will add to favorites next time I sign in.
Cheers,
Sam
(ThundersShadow)Written by Anonymous on chapter #5.
(March 18th 2007, 3pm)brillant. peter is the hero. how often is he ever painted this way? brillant.

Written by
(March 18th 2007, 12am)
gileadgrrl13 on chapter #5.This is an excellent story, taut and interesting, your characterizations are executed perfectly and I can't wait for the next chapter!

Written by
(March 15th 2007, 11am)



Oxymoron on chapter #5.Wonderful story. And thank you for giving Peter a place.
Written by Anonymous on chapter #5.
(March 15th 2007, 7am)You are an amazing writer! I love, love, loved this story! I swear, my eyes were glued to the screen for all five chapters... I love the fact that it was Peter that did stand up and say something. It made me smile like an idiot! Anyway, I love your story this much that not only am I saying the word 'love' way too much, but I'm using exclaimation marks... :) I really hope to read more of your writings soon!!!
xXx
Lor
Written by
(March 15th 2007, 5am)
bluetomatopasta on chapter #4.Thank you.
This has been my favorite (so far...).

Written by
(March 15th 2007, 4am)
bluetomatopasta on chapter #3.Hehe it just seemed like the prefect meeting you were referring to had occured earlier, but I see now that it wasn't...sorry!
I love how the points of view all take place at the same time. We get a nice, well-balanced view of what's happening. And, hehehe, I liked the Madam Pomfrey bit.
Teehee and it's cute that Remus drinks milk.
And this review is sort of a motley collection of likes, isn't it? Hmmm.
PS. There are also a few typos/grammatical things; I suggest you get someone to perhaps read it over and do a little editing for you...
Author Response:
Oh, well all the chapters take place at different times, it's not actually in order, you know. So the meeting did take place earlier, Remus's part is actually set before James's one, but it works better this way.I like milk, and I like Remus. So therefore, I think that Remus should drink milk! Plus, I have always seen him as liking chocolate, and milk goes well with chocolate, no? Alas, typos are a blight for me. I do have them read over, but there are always a few that escape you. It's extremely irritating.Out of all the reviews I've ever gotten for this story on other sites, you are the first person who has ever mentioned the Pomfrey bit. !!!!!!

Written by
(March 15th 2007, 3am)
bluetomatopasta on chapter #2.“No, no, no, Evans, you’re doing it all wrong. The wand goes in an anticlockwise direction! Anti-clockwise. Are you getting that? Am I saying it slowly enough for you?” Hehehehehehe (eloquent, I know).
LOVED this chapter! And it cleared up that question I had before...I feel very sorry for Stephen, though. It's not his fault that Lily and James are made for each other.
So, I'm gonna go read the next one now. Yay!
Author Response:
Yeah, I love Stephen too, the poor thing. I almost felt bad for making him suffer. But in my mind, he goes on to live a happy, love-filled life, wheras Lily and James die. There's irony for you ;)

Written by
(March 15th 2007, 12am)
bluetomatopasta on chapter #1.I like the story so far; I like the quirky Lily you've got going on.
I'm a little bit confused--are they friends? Fellow Prefects (and I guess you made a conscious choice to make James a prefect, even though it's not canon)? Enemies? Lily's reaction to James seems different at different points in this chapter...
But luckily, there are more chapters to read! I'm going to go do that now.
Author Response:
Oh, it's canon, it's set in 7th year, so James is actually Head Boy. Believe me, I detest anything that's not canon, and I triple checked this story for it. As for Lily's reactions... they're not friends or enemies, it's all explained in the Lily chapter.Thank you for your review!

Written by
(March 15th 2007, 12am)
infinitesimal on chapter #3.Oh my god.
This is amazing.I have never read a story so completely and utterly true to character. Everything just feels RIGHT. Lily and James's reactions to each other in particular-- the way she intrudes in his thoughts and how he can't choose between inlusting her or swooning over her, even in the privacy of his own mind. It's so real. You've taken a bunch of words and made several complex, different, remarkable human beings.
You have an unerring eye for humanity.
For gods sake, keep going!
Author Response:
Oh, wow, thank you so much! My first UR review, and such a lovely one!I'm afraid that chapter five is the ending, I didn't really feel the need to continue on, you know? I like the open ending. But I'll post other fics up here soon. Thank you again!-Sarah
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